Author: Sheng Tang rushong source wechat official account: the chief shopkeeper’s knife has been reprinted with authorization
In any case, the era of children is only our continuation, not our inheritance. The annual college entrance examination volunteer is basically over. A few years ago, I always wrote some articles about the college entrance examination, because at that time, I always indulged in the years of working together with my children. Now, six years after my children graduated from college, my enthusiasm for participating in the college entrance examination has long ceased. Therefore, the attention to the college entrance examination is also weakening.
But every year, some readers will ask me about children’s filling in volunteers and so on. In fact, I don’t have much experience. Because in fact, I failed in filling in the volunteers. In 2012, the children’s college entrance examination ended. Although their grades were not good, they only got two scores close to one, but it was already satisfactory for us. In filling in the volunteers, we also try our best, which is no worse than the end of accompanying reading. But even so, the child still filled in his favorite volunteer – sports news. The reason is very simple and funny. He likes football because he wants to be a sports journalist and can watch the game at any time and at no cost.
In fact, I am more relaxed about the choice of major, because I have seen many people who have not entered their own major after graduation from University, but finally choose some careers that are different from their own major. For example, a global radio anchor I like, who graduated from sports, turned out to be an international news anchor. This is a typical example of growing beans and melons. Of course, there are many examples around, all of which are like this. Therefore, as for what major a child chooses and what career he will pursue, I think four years of college life will enable him to find a career that can show his ability instead of the major he studied in school. Naturally, more examples show that engaging in the profession you are good at will make you get twice the result with half the effort in future social life.
In fact, I don’t care about the children who study journalism, because we are still very young and still struggling to live our own life and strive to accumulate some material foundation for the future development of our children, which is what we ordinary parents are doing, and it is also effective. For a child thousands of miles away, you just need to strictly tell him [her] not to violate the bottom line of human morality, not to try to play games with the law, not to get involved in those noisy places, and not to try to prove that you have superior restraint in gambling and drugs. As for others, let him go, or a more free college scene will enable every child to maximize their ideals.
This idea of mine is similar to Cao can’s rule of following the rules of Xiao and Cao, and governing by doing nothing. I admit that I am deeply influenced by this kind of thought, who prefers Tao Te Ching. But at the same time, I also deeply feel the gift from this thought. This is a very contradictory situation. Because doing nothing, in fact, you should not worry about the benefits of this behavior. But in fact, this inaction behavior can really bring beauty to your life.
Later, I pondered many times and came to a conclusion. That is, just because you don’t pursue anything, you have unexpected joy and gratitude for any results you get. But the so-called no pursuit does not mean no progress. The road of life must move forward. No matter whether the direction you choose is in line with the common judgment of the society at that time, if you move forward, you will always encounter different landscapes and harvest different fruits. Obviously, you can’t get these by standing where you are. But there is a premise here, that is, we can’t violate the morality that human beings follow, and we can’t play tricks on the laws and norms that regulate the operation of this society. Because those laws and norms, morality and ethics are thorns on the road of human progress. You can move forward, but don’t rush into the thorns. This is a common sense of life. Going against these is not a way forward, but a manifestation of self destruction. Knowing this, you can move forward boldly and freely.
My children basically follow this track. Although there are too many disappointments and depressions for me, I finally got out of my day. This piece of sky may not be as big as the four corners of the sky described by Lu Xun, but that piece of sky belongs to him, which I am sure of. As parents, if our children can support that small sky by themselves, it is enough to comfort us, isn’t it?
Therefore, in the face of the consultation of many readers, in addition to giving them some necessary suggestions [such as the choice of city, school and major, among which, in fact, I also used my resources to consult more friends who are more knowledgeable, knowledgeable, experienced and stand higher than me before I dare to speak out]. The most I said is to respect the wishes of my children, Even if he chooses a major that is not reliable in your opinion, [but the city and school should still adhere to their own opinions, because this requires the experience of life experience to be able to have an understanding. As for the major, the child’s interest is the best stimulant, which is not wrong at all.] At least during his [her] college, if you don’t want to work hard on his / her chosen major, you have a more active voice.
Respect has always been a noun on our lips, but how to grasp this degree is difficult for many parents to do. When a child is young, we should set up a correct value for him, formulate a strict growth rule and let him become an example for children to learn. These are more important factors than respect. But when the child’s college entrance examination is over and he is ready to move towards his life, respect is particularly necessary. Whether you respect it or not, children will have their own life, not the continuation of your life. Knowing this, maybe we will be more tolerant and leisurely when helping our children choose the future path.
Today, what we strive to achieve is the backing of the child, not the beacon of his guidance. In our own life, we are just groping, how can we point out a bright way for the child? However, it is an iron rule not to exceed the rules and regulations. Let children have full choice and freedom to walk on a smooth path. This is what our parents need to do and work hard. Tell the child that no matter what his future is, the lights at home will always be his warm harbor. It’s really not good. Go back to Hong Kong to have a rest and try to start again.