The Three Kingdoms is a world of male heroes. From the physical work of attacking cities and pulling out strongholds to the mental work of planning strategies, men are all operating. Next to this magnificent and gorgeous picture of the times, there will be some insignificant lace and tassels, which are the roles of women. Occasionally, oneortwo women, such as sun Xiaomei, who entered the center of the painting, have already taken on a somewhat masculine color.
However, heroes kill and set fire outside during the day, or stop others from killing and setting fire. When they return home from work, they still have to get along with women. It can be said that there is a larger female world around the heroes than the stage of the Three Kingdoms. These women do not make contributions to history, but exist so large and truly.
What are these grandma, aunt, sister and sister thinking? What kind of spiritual world do they have beyond the heroic ambition?
Let’s talk about the daughter-in-law of the Cao family. It’s not easy to marry a woman of the Cao family.
First generation daughter-in-law: Madam Ding resolutely breaks up with Cao Cao
Mrs. Ding is Cao Cao’s main room. She has no children. Cao Cao and Liu Fu have a son: Cao ang, the eldest son. Mrs. Liu died early, and Mrs. Ding took Cao ang as her son. I think a woman who has no children of her own will pour her utmost maternal love into the children she has brought up. The ancients said it well: “if you carry a negative person, you will be afraid that he will not live long.” Holding on to his or her back, for fear that he or she might have an accident and die halfway.
Lady Ding loves young master Cao so much that Cao Cao doesn’t cherish it very much. He wants to take lady Ding’s heart and soul to go out for training. Besides, it’s not a military exercise. It’s a real war to fight against Zhang Xiu. This was in 197 ad. the battle had been settled peacefully and Zhang Xiu surrendered.
Cao Cao felt guilty for madam Ding till he died
Cao Cao, who doesn’t want to be brilliant and broad-minded, also has his private morality. He wants to pick up girls. What girl is not easy to pick up, but he picks up Zhang Xiu’s aunt. This bubble ruined the newly formed Cao Zhang united front. Zhang Xiu launched a rebellion, and the lives of his son, nephew and good general Dian Wei were all ruined by Cao Cao’s one-time pick-up.
Cao Ang’s death was a fatal blow to Madam Ding. She did not turn grief into strength, nor did she speak of glory without conscience. This fierce mother cried and shouted to Cao Cao all day long: you don’t feel any pain at all for killing my son! “Kill my son, and don’t even think about it.”
Cao Cao was so annoyed with her crying and roaring that he sent him back to his mother’s house to make her more angry.
Is Dingfu popular? After a few days, the guilty Cao Cao went to his father-in-law’s house to pick up his wife. Mrs. Ding was weaving. Cao Cao walked behind her, stroked her back and said, “darling, come back with me by car.” Mrs. Ding did not look back at him, nor did she say anything. Cao Cao reluctantly walked out of the room and asked through the window, “is there really no hope of recovery?” Mrs. Ding did not respond. Cao Cao said very reluctantly, “you really broke up with me. It’s amazing.” So she was allowed to remarry, but who dares to marry the woman led by Cao?
Mr. Yi Zhongtian also mentioned this historical material. My purpose today is to explore the heart knot of this woman. From the perspective of Mrs. Ding’s position, if she wants to survive in the Cao family, she must have resources, and the best resource is children. She took pains to bring up ang Tzu. There is no record of Cao Ang’s date of birth in history, but it can be inferred from the fact that Cao ang was able to go to the front line and was responsible for the cover: Cao ang has reached the age to work and participate in the revolution.
From the mother’s point of view, it is not difficult to understand Mrs. Ding’s psychology: I managed to cultivate this resource, but you didn’t use it sparingly. A battle would be reimbursed, and my position and future in the Cao family would vanish. Around Cao ang, the gap between mother’s love and father’s love makes Mrs. Ding hate Cao Cao. What really made Mrs. Ding hate Cao Cao to the bone was that although Cao ang had made a glorious sacrifice according to the organizational standards, he paid for his father’s girls with his own life. Try to understand from a mother’s point of view that your most beloved son died of her husband’s act of picking up girls. Can you forgive all this?
Therefore, Mrs. Ding left the Cao family and history with a figure of her determination in front of the loom. As the first generation daughter-in-law of the Cao family, Mrs. Ding’s heart is hated, her life is bitter, and she is unhappy. Many years later, Cao Cao, who was terminally ill, said with regret: “I am dead. I met Cao ang under the nine springs. If he asked me: where did you get my mother? How can I tell you?” This is probably the softest corner of Cao Cao’s inner world recorded.
Yang Xiu was killed. Mrs Bian wrote a letter to comfort Yang Xiu’s parents
Among Cao Cao’s wives, the one with the best reputation is, of course, Mrs Bian. She is the mother of Cao Pi, Cao Zhang and Cao Zhi. She is thrifty, magnanimous and sensible. There is no need to say more. Mrs Bian has also played a good auxiliary role in her husband’s work. Once in history, she was good at crisis public relations for her husband.
Cao Cao killed Yang Xiu, but the matter is not over. Yang Xiu still has his family, especially his father, Taiwei Yangbiao. He has to meet this old comrade every day at work. He must have an explanation.
Cao Cao stubbornly wrote a letter to Mr. Yang to explain that although your son of the Yang family was smart, he did not listen to the leaders. In order to save your family, I, Cao Cao, killed my relatives. Of course, it was me who killed your relatives. He brought the boy to justice. “If you are tired, you will be punished.”. Then he gave a lot of gifts to the Yang family.
Cao Cao felt that men’s words alone could not handle the situation well, so he invited Mrs. Bian to do her wife’s public relations, and then wrote a letter from the perspective of women to smooth the situation a little more. Mrs. Bian wrote another letter to the grieving parents of Yang Xiu. From this letter, we can see that Mrs. Bian is different from Mrs. Ding’s resolute determination, but a political woman who is very measured and can use political skills. She put aside the political and military principles, and first gave the victim a positive evaluation: “a talent of the world”. Our whole family respected him very much. Then, he did not know that Yang Xiu deserved what he deserved. He deliberately blurred the issue of principle. He said that it was a time of war and he paid attention to organizational discipline. I heard that his son seemed to have violated the military order. Use these two points to iron the hearts of the victims’ families. Then, she accused her husband: my husband was too impatient, “Ming Gong was impatient and angry”, and he punished Comrade Xiao Yang, but the accusation did not mean negation, and argued that Cao Cao was trying to safeguard military discipline. Finally, he explained that he had reservations about killing Yang Xiu: I didn’t know the situation at that time. After hearing that, I was very shocked and sad, “shocked and cut off”. I also asked the old man and the old lady to forgive me.
This is a very skillful public relations letter, which is not inferior to those diplomatic letters of the first lady of the president. With her intelligence and low profile, Mrs. Bian was able to do well in the Cao family and enjoyed glory. She lived until her grandson ascended the throne. She was happily the “Empress Dowager” of the state of Wei. However, is she happy?
Everyone knows the story of her three sons fighting. In 213 A.D., Cao Pi poisoned his younger brother Cao Zhang with poisonous dates at the residence of empress Bian. Cao Pi was cruel enough to kill his brother in front of his mother. The poor mother went to the well to fetch water to detoxify zhang’er. However, the container for fetching water was damaged, and the palace maids and eunuchs were afraid to help. A helpless mother watched her helpless son die helplessly. Her heart must be crying: son, what can I do to save you? Finally, in the ruthless political ecological field, the mother pleaded with her eldest son, the murderer Cao Pi, saying: you hurt your second brother, don’t hurt your third brother any more.
From this inference, is Mrs Bian happy? Everyone knows the answer.
Second generation daughter-in-law: Zhen was careful but shocked step by step. After his death, he didn’t even have a normal funeral
The most legendary daughter-in-law of the Cao family is Zhen. She was Yuan Shao’s daughter-in-law and met Cao Pi in Youzhou after the war. The beauty in troubled times seems to be especially lovable. When Zhen looked up and Cao Pi looked down, love came into being. Cao Pi loved her, married her, spoiled her, but killed her. Why did you kill her? Was she careless? No, in such an environment, Zhen was careful step by step, but he was startled step by step.
A beautiful heart may not have a beautiful life
This beautiful woman has very beautiful intentions. She repressed her thoughts for her husband and son, but clearly expressed her feelings for her mother-in-law, so as to have a safe living space in a society that advocates filial piety. And enumerate Zhen’s two advanced deeds in filial piety.
In the 16th year of Jian’an (A.D. 211), Cao Cao conquered Guanzhong. Mrs. Bian, Zhen’s mother-in-law, accompanied him. On the way, news came that Mrs. Bian was in trouble. Zhen “cried day and night”. Unable to bear it, he told her that madam Bian had recovered a little. Zhen still didn’t believe it: “my mother-in-law usually recovers very slowly every time she gets sick. How can she recover so quickly this time? You’re not fooling me, are you?” As a result, they became more and more worried.
When Mrs Bian learned at the front that her daughter-in-law was worried about her, she wrote back to prove that she had indeed recovered. Only then did Zhen resume her normal life.
In the 21st year of Jian’an, Cao Cao went on a business trip to fight again. Along the way, he took Mrs. Bian, Zhen’s mother-in-law, Cao Pi, Zhen’s husband, Cao Rui, Zhen’s son, and Dongxiang princess. During this period, Zhen’s thoughts of her husband and children should be emaciating. Besides, Zhen is still ill.
Surprisingly, when the Cao family came back from the front the next year, they found that Zhen looked very good and had gained weight. Everyone was puzzled, but Zhen explained: “my husband, my children and my mother-in-law are together. What do I have to worry about?” It shows a hundred and twenty reassurances for my mother-in-law.
I have serious doubts about these two advanced deeds. Because Zhen’s feelings for her mother-in-law seem to have gone beyond their due scope, going too far and showing off a bit. There must be a state of mind that is too careful behind an excessive move. Xiang Zhen was originally a female member of yuanshao group. She became the daughter-in-law of Cao family because of an emotional encounter. The original political ties in yuanshao family have been broken, and the original resources have suddenly evaporated. As a result, she is an isolated individual. In a completely unfamiliar family field, she needs a safe living space. In order to exchange this space, parents’ approval must be obtained. To gain recognition, you can’t go too far. It’s usually just not enough. Zhen’s intentions are painstaking.
Empress Guo came out to pay back
However, Zhen’s beautiful intentions did not exchange for a beautiful life. In the second year after Cao Pi ascended the throne, Zhen was killed because of her new favorite, empress Guo. Zhen’s death was very sad. His hair was scattered and his face was covered. Rice bran was stuffed into his mouth. He looked like a fierce ghost.
Zhen is unhappy. However, Guo, who deprives her of happiness, is happy? Don’t forget that the Zhen family and their descendants, Cao Rui, were the later emperor Wei Ming.
The death of his mother greatly stimulated Cao Rui’s young mind. He often asked empress Guo: How did my mother die? Empress Guo was shocked when asked, and answered in embarrassment: “your father killed her. What’s my business? Do you have to investigate the criminal responsibility of your father as a son? Do you kill your stepmother because of your own mother?”
Cao Rui was enraged. After he ascended the throne, he had the power of life and death in his hands, so he “forced to kill” Guo, who was already the Empress Dowager. There were also reports that Guo died suddenly because of fear. Anyway, his death was strange and abnormal. Weiming emperor, who wanted to avenge his mother, gave empress dowager Guo the same treatment as his biological mother – disorderly hair covering and stuffed bran in his mouth. What you did to my mother at first, I do to you now.
The third generation of daughter-in-law: a worker’s family background will kill him if he asks the wrong question
Cao Rui’s mother Zhen was the victim of the court’s struggle for favor. Cao Rui also avenged his mother. However, he only stayed at the point of revenge and did not realize the liberation of women comrades. Of course, 1700 years ago, it was difficult for Comrade Cao Rui to achieve this kind of consciousness.
Cao Rui’s empress, Mao, came from the working class. Mr. Mao makes cars (of course, carriages) on the assembly line. At present, the workers’ origins are very glorious, but at that time they were not. The Yu family, the high-ranking imperial concubine, had hoped to become the queen, but Miss Mao from the workers’ family stole the quota. Mrs. Bian comforted her granddaughter-in-law. Yu family said bitterly, “Cao family is self-supporting but cheap.” That is to say, the Cao family likes cheap women, which probably annoyed grandma Bian, who came from an entertainment star’s family. Yu was returned.
Is empress Mao happy? It is also a kind of pseudo happiness. Soon, Cao Rui, a playboy, doted on a concubine surnamed Guo. In 236 ad, Emperor Wei Ming visited the backyard, accompanied by the imperial concubines. Guo felt a little sorry and said, “you should inform the queen.” Cao Rui said heartlessly, “Whoever dares to inform the queen will never live.” Empress Mao, who was full of grievances, tried to tell Cao Rui the next day: “did you enjoy your visit to the garden yesterday?” It was only a careful inquiry, but Cao Rui was angry. A dozen witnesses and empress Mao were killed. A romantic jealousy ended in blood.
However, in order to cover the blood with a veil of happiness, Cao Rui gave the wronged empress Mao a good posthumous title, gave a heavy burial, and vigorously rewarded the empress’s family.
Conclusion: the annals of the Three Kingdoms covers the coffin of happiness for the Cao family’s daughters in law, saying that the Cao family’s daughters in law are very happy and classic, and their style is “beautiful in this way”, which is a model worth learning from, “enough to regulate a hundred kings”. In short, the happiness of Cao’s daughter-in-law is an unspeakable secret.
In contrast, the Ding family, who dared to break with Cao Cao publicly and saw Cao Cao off with the figure of shaking the spinning wheel on his knees, was really very happy, very happy. Cao Cao, who lingers and yearns deeply outside Mrs. Ding’s parents’ home, is really great, very great. With regard to women, the Cao family has become worse from generation to generation, and their careers have become worse from generation to generation.
Many rich and noble ladies are false fruits of happiness packaged in shiny fashion. Of course, I am not just talking about the Three Kingdoms period.